I looked up and found hope

Life is never a constant; it is ever changing from day to day. Some days are full of moments of joy and happiness, but it is a transient state. Some days are tiring and troublesome which leave you depressed and unhappy. On such occasions if you get timely help and support then you edge out of such situations and get the impetus to move in the right direction. I was lucky to experience a moment of hope and optimism when I needed it most.

My family comprised of my parents and a brother and a sister who were both elder to me.

I was the youngest of the children and so I was the most pampered. There was a rule in our family that all the boys were to study commerce and all the girls were to take home science as a subject so that they could become proficient in cooking and household affairs. Every one was content with this decision and no one ever debated over this issue or said a word against it.

I was different and since all my wishes were always instantly fulfilled I revolted against the idea of taking up home science as a subject. I was not at all happy and felt it to be a most dull and boring subject to study. I did not want to waste my life doing something that I did not like and had no aptitude for. I had great interest in science and found it be a very exciting topic. There were never any dull moments with science and I was determined that I would be the path changer in the family by taking up science instead of home science. I talked to my sister about my wanting to take up science as a subject. She was aghast at the very thought that I could even think of such a thing. She told me that it was against the rule and if I dared to express my wish I would only incur the wrath of the elders. This did not deter me at all and I knew that I had to make a stand for myself. I thought of having a heart to heart talk with my mother. I took her into confidence but even she reacted sharply when I told her that I wanted to take up science as a subject. She told me that I should give up my foolish dream and expressed her inability to help me in this matter when she found me to be adamant.

I did not know what to do but at the same time I did not want to give up so easily although I was giving up hope. In the evening when my father came home I saw my mother talking to him in a serious tone. Then he looked at me and in a most stern voice asked me to see him in his room. Although I was shivering with fear I put on a bold front and went to his room. Angrily he asked me as to what he was hearing about my wanting to take up science. Fearfully I looked up at him and was surprised to see him smiling. He patted me on my back for my brave decision. He told me that he was proud of me for taking a stand on an issue which had always been a sore point for him. He had always wanted to take up the medical profession but the dictates of the house had prevented him from doing so. Now he was on my side and would support me all the way as he was confident that I would succeed in my mission.

His inspirational words filled me with a new hope and optimism and helped me in selecting the subjects of my choice. Without his timely help and intervention I would not have succeeded.
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March ahead with the power of together

I led a very carefree and happy childhood. I was the youngest child and so every one gave me great attention and pampered me endlessly. I was every one’s favorite and my family showered me with gifts. As a result I had the largest collection of toys and the best dresses in my wardrobe. All my dresses were bought new and there were no hand outs of my elder sister’s clothes. I normally spent all my time either playing with my toys or reading comic books and stories of adventure. I loved reading science fiction which was my favorite and these books held a special place in my book rack. My elder sister would often reprimand me for living in my dreams and told me that this was not the purpose of my life as I was expected to be content within the four walls of my house. She said this from her experience since the girls of our house were supposed to be trained in the culinary arts and other household affairs like knitting and sewing. We were not permitted to dream or go on flights of fancy. All this talk slightly dampened my spirits but I was determined to follow my dreams. Going from class to class I found myself at the deciding stage when the subjects were to be chosen according to the choice of one’ career. According to my sister my dreams were doomed to die a silent death as my father would never allow me to take science subjects. They were not for the girls of our house. Just when I was going to give up hope I got support from the most unexpected quarter-my father. We had a heart to heart talk and he lauded my effort for speaking up my mind. He told me that he had always wanted to take up science but his desires were quashed before the verdict of his father who insisted that it was to be commerce for him. Happily I started my science classes and proudly displayed my science text books to one and all. I had been under the misconception that taking science was all that mattered. I was wrong in thinking so. I had to study hard and although I was getting good grades in botany and physics but I was floored by chemistry. I tried hard to master it but failed. This made me not only desperate but also sad. My cheerful smile was gone and was now replaced by a constant frown. My science teacher noticed this change and called me to her room during the recess. We sat # together for quite some time. She said that she had never before seen a determined girl like me. She assured me that I could easily gain mastery over chemistry. She made me do some equations explaining each step to me. What had before seemed like an uphill task seemed like a child’s play to me. My confidence returned and I was now smiling once again all because of that moment of being #together.
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#together

जब कहीं

जब कहीं कोई फूल खिलता है
तो कहीं कोईतितली  उसपर मंडरती है
कौन देता है उस तितली को उस फूल का पता
ना जाने यह कोई ना किसी को यह राज़ है पता

मैं कवि नहीं

मैं कवि नहीं
मैं कवि नहीं ना मैं कोई शायर
फिर भी मेरे शब्द बिन्ध जाते हैं
तो कविता बनती है
मेरे अल्फ़ाज़ मिलते हैं तो नज़म

इज़ाजत

इज़ाजत
इज़ाजत दें तो में आऊँ
इज़ाजत दें तो में जाऊँ
इज़ाजत नहीं इज़ाजत माँगने की
इज़ाजत मिले तो क्या ना कर जाऊं

नज़र नज़र की बात

नज़र नज़र की बात

नज़र नज़र की बात
कभी नज़र झुकी तो
कभी नज़र मुस्कुराई
जब पानी आँख में तो
बना आँसू
चड़ा चेहरे पर तो बना रुआब
जब शरम आई तो हुआ
इंसान पानी पानी

पैड के नीचे

पैड के नीचे
कैसा यह साया है
कौन दिल का हाल सुनाने
अकेला यहाँ आया हैं
दिल में गम भरा है इतना
कि आँसू बन कर
आँखो से श्लक आया है